If you look at a map of Seoul, you will see a big green blob at the top. That is Bukhansan National Park. To a naive foreigner, it looks like a cute nature spot. A place for a casual Sunday stroll to breathe some fresh air.
Stop right there. Korean mountains are not “hills.” They are made of granite, jagged rocks, and infinite stairs designed by the devil himself.
But thousands of foreigners make the same mistake I did: They try to climb the highest peak in Converse sneakers and jeans.
Welcome to Level 1. Let me tell you how I almost slid off a cliff, and why Korean hikers look like they are climbing Mount Everest.
The “Idiot” Archives: Death by Converse
Flashback: 2 years ago. Bukhansan Entrance.
I saw beautiful photos of Baegundae Peak on Instagram. I thought, “Hey, it’s just inside the city. How hard can it be?” I wore my favorite skinny jeans and flat sneakers. I brought one small bottle of water. I was ready for a fashion shoot.
10 minutes later, I was sweating. 30 minutes later, the paved road disappeared and turned into giant, slippery rocks. 1 hour later, I was clinging to a metal cable for dear life, my sneakers sliding on the granite like I was ice skating.
Meanwhile, 70-year-old Korean grandmas were zooming past me, wearing $500 hiking boots, listening to Trot music on portable radios. I felt humiliated.
Enter “Ssam” (The Gear Master)
I barely survived. When I met Ssam later, my legs were shaking like noodles. “Ssam, why didn’t you warn me? I thought I was going to die up there!”
Ssam looked at my shoes and shook his head. “Alice, you don’t climb Bukhansan in sneakers. That’s suicide.”
He explained the Korean Hiking Philosophy: “In Korea, hiking is 30% exercise, 30% fashion show, and 40% an excuse to drink alcohol afterwards.”
Level 3 Wisdom: How to Survive a Korean Mountain
Ssam gave me the cheat codes for my next hike. Read this before you go.
1. The Fashion Gap: You vs. Ajussis
You will notice something weird. Korean hikers (especially the older generation) look like they are going on an expedition to the Himalayas.
- The Gear: Hiking sticks, colorful windbreakers, professional backpacks, gloves.
- The Lesson: You don’t need that much gear, but please, wear proper hiking boots (or running shoes with grip). Granite rocks are slippery. Jeans are a prison for your legs. Wear leggings or gym shorts.
2. The Stairs of Doom
Korean national parks love stairs. Endless, vertical wooden stairs. Just when you think you are at the top, you will see another staircase reaching into the clouds.
- Pro Tip: Don’t rush. The Ajummas will pass you. Let them pass. It’s not a race.
3. The Real Prize: Makgeolli & Pajeon
This is the most important part. The goal of hiking is NOT the view. The goal is the food waiting at the bottom. After the hike, you must go to a restaurant at the mountain entrance and order:
- Makgeolli (막걸리): Korean Rice Wine.
- Pajeon (파전): Green Onion Pancake.
- Dubu-Kimchi (두부김치): Tofu with stir-fried Kimchi.
Ssam says: “The Makgeolli tastes 10x better when your legs hurt.” He is right.
Alice’s Bottom Line: Earn Your Drink
Don’t underestimate Korean mountains. They are beautiful, but they are beasts. Prepare your gear, survive the stairs, and treat yourself to that glorious Makgeolli at the end.
That first sip after 4 hours of sweating? That is the taste of Seoul.
Survival Hangul: Hiking Edition
- “정상까지 얼마나 남았어요?” (Jeongsang-kkaji eolmana nam-asseoyo?)”
- Meaning: “How much further to the peak?”
- Warning: Koreans will always lie and say “Almost there” (Da wat-seo / 다 왔어). Don’t trust them. It’s usually another 30 minutes.
- “막걸리 하나 주세요. (Makgeolli hana juseyo.)”
- Meaning: “One bottle of rice wine, please.” (The magic spell).
- “수고하세요! (Sugo-haseyo!)”
- Meaning: “Keep up the good work.” (Say this to fellow hikers as you pass them. It’s polite).